That ain’t your money

Here’s an update of what I’ve been reading:

Rob Whitaker, from his hospital bed, is throwing shade at Kelvin and Adesanya. Stuff like, Adesanya is not that great, they’re fighting for Cejudo’s belt, etc. I would encourage him to get his large intestines in order before commenting further on possible fights. I’m going to need him to stay out of the hospital for a bit.

Till Vs Masvidal? The fight means nothing, but I love Masvidal. Unfortunately,  he is headed for veteran old head status, fighting for money alone. No shade, it’s just the way it is. Hopefully Mas can show Till some levels to this game.

Jeremy Stephens had suicidal thoughts after his loss to Aldo. Dang. That’s rough. Once again, no shade over here because if someone hit me so hard in the liver, and I folded up like so many lawn chairs, then got a couple of fists to the head, I would be in a very dark place too. I think this is what people mean when they a fighter has taken someone’s soul. It’s one thing to contemplate retirement, but suicide? Soul snatched. For sure.

Ben Askren said if Colby Covington never fights again no one would care. Not true. I would care very much. Colby beat RDA and Maia and won the interim belt. I was looking forward to the unification fight between him and Woodley. I don’t care about Askren. At all. He could go back to ONE and I would lose no sleep. Like a baby. I will sleep.

Ferguson Vs Max? I told you. Poirier for interim belt? Because Tony rightfully turned it down. Lightweight is officially a mess. People are asking why Tony would turn this down, and outside of the money issue, the reason is clear: Holding an interim title means nothing. It can be stripped at will, depending on your status with the organization at that particular moment in time. It can be snatched in the blink of an eye if someone else has a better storyline. Sorry Colby.

UFC is an organization where you strike when the iron is hot and take opportunities when offered because you never know what’s going to happen. That’s how Bisping got his shot (I’m still salty), and it’s how Nate got his shot against Conor. That might be frustrating to fighters, but extremely exciting for fans. We can’t stop talking about the chaos.

And last, Adesanya says no PPV payout is money left on the table. It is. But that ain’t your money, my dude. The person who left that money on the table is the champ, who, at the moment, is not yet able to walk after inexplicably getting his intestines tangled in a knot on the day of the fight. That was his money. Gastelum should ask for that money due to his (and our) pain and suffering.

M

You’re done

Some fighters just don’t get it. I mean, not at all. Stipe and Cyborg come to mind. Stipe should rematch with Francis, just so we can see exactly who is the number one contender. Then that guy can kick rocks until DC is ready to fight again.

Cyborg wants a new contract. I think she should fight Megan as her farewell fight, then move on to those green pastures of Rizin with her BFF Gabi (btw, I love Gabi). They can have a tag team jiu-jitsu /punch face tournament against whoever wants it. Middle of the night in Japan, book it. I’ll be asleep. Will watch the recaps online later and laugh.

GSP is retiring. Sad news. Whenever I feel depressed, I like to think about the night he took that belt from Bisping. Oh well. You know he’s not really retiring. I predict he will fight in 2019.

Anthony Smith is intrigued by Colby. Intrigued, worried, concerned, fascinated, obsessed? I don’t know, but he keeps talking about him and responding to nonsense on twitter. We all know Colby’s act is just that, an act. To get attention, to get a fight, to manufacture a fake beef for clicks. Like wrestling. It’s fake. Why does anyone give his antics serious consideration? I saw a headline, something like, “Rousey defends her belt…” Belt? For a fake fight? I know people enjoy this, but I ignore it. Similarly, Smith should ignore Colby and prepare for Jon Jones.

Cain. Wow. All that buildup for nothing. If you’re done, you’re done. No shame in that. Thanks for the memories.

And speaking of buildup and frustration, do I have to say anything about the botched mess that was Gastelum Vs that guy from New Zealand or Australia who keeps pounding himself on the chest and can’t stay out of the hospital and I am quite sick of him?

MMA really has me on the verge these days.

So anyway, Dustin Poirier wants a release. Is this the same dude that won a fight and during his post – fight interview, started yelling about how he needed to eat? Like his family is starving or something? I keep hearing how the economy is doing so well, record low unemployment and jobs everywhere. Sounds like somebody needs to be taking advantage. Dana should give him his release just for acting crazy and dropping out of the fight with Nate. And he’s not a needle mover.

And last, a rumor is out that Max will fight Tony Ferguson for the interim lightweight belt. UFC likes to play with our emotions. This fight won’t happen. And if it does, what are the odds one of them will fight Khabib? 0.

Zero. I’m done getting hyped up for these fights.

Besides, does Tony really want another interim belt? It means absolutely nothing. It doesn’t even mean that you are #1 contender. Well actually, that’s all it means. It means that on the meaningless rankings, somebody will place your name in the 1 spot. Does the winner get the new belt? Of course! Remember the last rumor that the old belt cost the company $300K to manufacture? If that was true, they wouldn’t be giving them out like so much Halloween candy. And they would not have sent DJ 25 of them. UFC is not in the business of giving stuff away for free.

Truth: That new belt is big and pretty. I would believe a lie that this one is worth $300K.

M

 

 

If it walks

So the fight is off, huh? Come on, man! He got sick and couldn’t fight Rockhold, now he’s got a hernia. A hernia? On the day of the fight?

He’s ducking Kelvin. Strip him. He’s not holding a real belt anyway, so it’s better for all of us if he is stripped right away. Like ripping off a bandaid. Do it quick, because we don’t know how long it’s gonna take to heal his hernia.

We need an interim now. Adesanya said earlier that he will never be a backup, tonight he should fight Kelvin for the interim.

M

Hype train?

Another hype train being promoted by the UFC this weekend. I like Adesanya, but gentlemen, he is no Anderson Silva. There were tears at the weigh in today.

In regard to Anderson and his contemporaries, I imagine it was exciting to be a young man, going around the world throwing hands. Sure, some of you would like for your son to make a living behind a desk, hands resting peacefully on top of it. Why not let them hands go upside somebody’s head? Touch that chin. A liver kick? Or like the man said, hit him hard and often.

I like the moment when someone wins. The climb to the top of the cage, taking it all in. It’s a great feeling for me, and I’m just a spectator. Those days are coming to an end for The Spider and he knows it. There were tears today.

The OGs have given their youth to this sport. A sport that, apparently, it’s hard to walk away from. I wonder if it’s Silva’s last fight.

Probably.

I’m not excited about this card, but I am impressed with Kelvin. He’s really grown up since TUF. He talks different, looks different. He’s a new dude at 185 and I like his chances in this fight. Go Kelvin and Spider.

M

Birds, butterflies, and California

Adam Levine removed his shirt during his Super Bowl performance and revealed a torso marked with various random objects. I saw a few birds, butterflies, and the word “California,” in large plain text across his stomach.

If, as a a grown up male, you remove your shirt in public, a few rules need to be observed:

All tattoos must be relevant. See Anthony Pettis, Marreta, the Lioness, etc.

If you are representing a certain place, be specific. You can’t show up with the name of a state on your stomach. Where you from, bro? So Cal? Sacramento? Stockton? AKA? Check with Cub Swanson for clarification.

Exceptions? New York, Texas, Brazil.

That halftime show was tragic on so many levels, but the absolute worst was Levine removing his shirt to show us a chest that was … um, problematic. You can’t show up to an event like this with old songs, tired dancing, and overall lameness and your body is not 100% on point. At least put something out there for the ladies. Like Rockhold and Romero. I think Dana trots them out like show ponies. And for good reason.

M